I was upset.
Nevertheless I have every right to get mad. So screw you.
As I mentioned I am going to read Seneca today.
From now on I am only addressing the 3% minority who in this case are the authors.
You can join me or you can do whatever you like. I don't care.
As it is I am cybernetic looping with Kiss 92.
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It is nice to read about somebody's work. I however is a creator not a consumer. Therefore my inclination is to create my own work.
In coming out with my creation, I can say I simply write what comes to mind. At this moment I simply feel like writing about my sadness in knowing Sarah is a boy with tits and Els is nothing more than a Chubby Chubb.
Both violated my basic prerequisites; which is simply to deal with a girl other than a Chubby Chubb.
If I view it from that angle, then I must say I am a very unlucky person when comes to love. It cannot be worst than this. With that I conclude that I am not going to be any luckier.
I am doomed to live a solitary life. In the end nothing is going to materialize. I might as well conclude that other than what I do PERSONALLY with my life, I will not have any success in influencing others.
Not Sarah, not Els and not even Rex Montis.
Hence I should recluse into my own private world where I can be anybody I like including God of my 12 meters square.
Nothing matters anymore. Without Unconditional Love, there is no more magic. There is no feeling of unsurpassed certainty, no brutal sex drive, no transmutation into work culture and not excellence in life.
My issue is Unconditional Love. Without it then my l[ov]e had lost it true meaning, Without meaning there is no purpose.
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There is one possible answer. That is Unconditional Love means it is transcending across all forms of stereotypes. I simply give without expecting anything in return.
Am I that magnanimous? I don't know. I had been there before. It's a good feeling although is is not reciprocal.
Tell me Sarah, how it is possible for me to shift my feeling for a woman to a guy that acted as a girl for 2 1/2 years? Or how is it possible for me to love a Chubby Chubb who is not reciprocating?
These are remote instances and yet it's happening to me. Makes me wonder if the Sierpinski Pyramid is actually inverted.
Maybe it is. If Sparta 4964 is a bottom-up spiral, it is very possible that the Sierpinski Pyramid is also inverted.
But what is the implication? Does that mean I am a total loser? There are others worse than me. How can I be complete and yet lost? I don't understand this axiom.
What is the Path trying to tell me? Maybe Unconditional Love is truly unconditional. Maybe it cuts across the board. Gosh I don't know. Maybe none of my assertion is true. I am nothing more than a man disillusioned.
Do I hold on to the illusions or do I discard them?
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